Update

Just a quick update from the other side of sea-level; things are starting to gain a patina of normality following last weeks news, but it, like beauty, is only skin-deep. Things are not the same (can never be the same), but we’ve forced ourselves to choke down another dollop of stress and grief and haven’t quite gagged on it – yet – though we’re in the artificially tranquil part before the storm really hits, with the funeral at the end of next week (Thursday or Friday, as best we know) and then the impending arrival of Daniel, all of which will blow hurricanes through our lives.

The main emotions I feel are primarily exhaustion, sorrow, disbelief and grim determination to hang on for dear life; to use an obvious example, its like being told that a country, so large and solid looking and a place that we’ve taken for granted as a refuge, just isn’t there anymore. Its simultaneously incredible in its profundity and miserable in its banality. It just doesn’t make sense.

Still, oogling at the wreckage – either metaphorically or quite literally in the case of Japan – doesn’t serve anyone any benefits, and life can, should, must & will go on.

Daniel, is, after all, alive & well – the scan this morning showed that he is head down, fully engaged, and is ready to go at any moment. We raised the question of whether they thought it would be safe for us to go over to the UK to attend the funeral and they were quite categorical: absolutely not. As such, I’m going to take Thursday & Friday off as holiday next week, so I can be with C whilst the funeral takes place in the UK.

So there we have it. Despite everything, this is not the worst that could happen; if anything, this simply highlights that life is a wonderful, delicate and brilliant gift that we have to use it to make the world a better place. The alternative, after all, is that we end up stuck staring at wreckage & dreaming mournfully of the past.

S